Musings on Memoirs

Just came from the premiere of Memoirs of a Geisha at Greenbelt 3.

I found the movie visually stunning and it made me more intrigued to know more about Japanese culture. They say this movie is heavily westernized but I still liked it, quite a surprise because I'm not really a big fan of Asian culture (except ours of course). Funny, I read in a lot of reviews that the movie should have been done in Japanese because first because it's set in Japan and so that the actors could act better speaking in their native tongue. Another reviewer pointed out that although the film is set in Japan, the book is written in English so why would anyone want to translate it to Japanese and then include English subtitles? Plus, the main actors are not even Japanese so it wouldn't really be their native tongue.

On my way back to the office, I remember what Sayuri (Zhang Ziyi) said towards the end. She told the Chairman that every step she'd taken since she was a child was to get closer to him. I could relate. But what was striking was that I was able to relate, thinking about my former Object of Affection. Although I was quite guarded when it came to him (just because I'm the type of girl who is uncomfortable around a guy I like), I made many decisions and many moves to get closer to him but as my friends know, nothing came out of that. Then I began to think:

"Can't you see? Every step I have taken, since I was that child on the bridge, has been to bring myself closer to you."

The only one who truly deserves this line is Jesus Christ. I began to think of the many times I had wasted thinking about how to get closer to a person but exerting only a portion of my effort to get closer to Him. Despite my bible reading every night, despite my prayers, or the services and prayer meetings I attend, I know I can devote more of myself to Him, to bringing myself closer to Him. As I embark on a new challenge this March, that will be my primary goal.

Surprise, surprise

Everything is happening really fast. For those who haven't heard yet, I'm handing in my resignation letter tomorrow. Yes, after three years with Summit, I have decided to move on. Some people I've told are surprised because I'm probably one of the people least likely to resign. The fact is, I'm happy here. My job is not your usual 9-5, I work with extremely talented and creative people, I meet a mix of interesting people--members of the press, celebrities, models, DJs, writers, etc..., and most importantly, my time is flexible and I am able to do the things I really want to do, which is discipling young women and serving God and my church.

Last Prayer and Fasting, I had two job opportunities. But God said loudly and clearly to stay here but I disobeyed a little because, for the first time in years, I actually went to a job interview. It turned out to be a disaster (sabi na kasi ni God to stay, ang kulit ko pa). Last year naman, He told me to leave my job and I didn't. But my days of disobedience are over.

Yesterday, my mom offered me a job managing our family business. Kasi she accepeted na a job at one of the leading mobile phone companies and there are changes happening at home (good changes, changes I've been praying for for years) and mom needs me to be there at home to help her with the business and be with my little siblings--Gabbi and Amico. At first, I was hesitant. I was willing to move back home temporarily but I was not sure about leaving my job. But I told my mom that I would pray about it.

Here is what God said: Deuteronomy 10:11 "'Go,' the Lord said to me, 'and lead the people on their way, so that they (my family) may enter and possess the land that I swore to their fathers to give them." Deuteronomy 11:10-12 "The land you are entering to take over is not like the land of Egypt, from which you have come, where you planted your seed and irrigated it by foot as in a vegetable garden. But the land you are crossing the Jordan to take possession of is a land of mountains and valleys that drinks rain from heaven. It is the land your God cares for; the eyes of the Lord your God are continually on it from the beginning of the year to the end."

The answer is actually four chapters long and it's a resounding YES from God. Last night (or rather this morning because I slept at 4am), I had moments of fear. I have been so used to being here. God has blessed me here at Summit. My salary's been increased 5 times since I became a Christian and I've been promoted twice. That wouldn't have happened if not for God's favor. I'm not being modest when I say this. It is the truth. People who know me can attest to this. Anyway, I had moments of fear and even today, there are times when I got scared. But I just want to obey the Lord this time. I know that if he wants me back here, He will make a way -- just as he has made a way for every single prayer I've prayed, every desire of my heart. I just feel so overwhelmingly blessed. Words cannot express how happy I am.

Now, I can be with my siblings and take care of them and teach them to be godly children. Now, I can devote more time to God. Now, I can focus on what's really important to me --
1. God
2. My Family
3. My Ministry
4. My Job (managing the family business)

I can save money because I don't need to pay rent or buy my food everyday. I can manage our household since as you can see in my former blog entry, I have taken an interest in being a domestic princess.
Everything is just falling into place and I am happy. Although it seems like everything is going so fast, I just feel a calm because I know this is where God wants me to be.

Me as a Domestic Goddess

It's finally happening. The funny thing is that when it's not forced upon me by anyone, it comes out naturally--the domestic goddess in me.

There have been traces of it that comes out every so often when I get the sudden urge to clean my room. Like I've said in the past I'm an OC-wannabe. I want to be like the people who make lists everyday and put a neat little check on every item after it's been accomplished, I want to not be able to sleep when something is out of place, I want to experience bliss with everything around me clean. Now, I feel it's really happening. One day last week, I went home at 1am (came from work), I went into my bathroom and I just saw some soap marks on my bathroom walls and at 2am (because I spent an hour doing my prayer list [oh I do love lists!]), I started scrubbing--the walls, the floor, under the sink, the toilet bowl--until everything was as clean as I wanted them to be. This is a big thing because I've never done it my whole life. Oh, what satisfaction that gave me!

So today, I bought myself a mop, a window cleaner, dishwashing liquid, insect killer and I realize that yes, I am turning into a domestic princess (a few notches below being a domestic goddess). I'm not yet a Bree Van De Kamp, but I sure would like to have some of her OC qualities.

I'm excited to go home to my tiny bedroom, with my mop and bags of grocery in tow, and start scrubbing, mopping and wiping like crazy.